The Amazing Race:
Nintendo Universe

By Stephen Stephano


 

Race Leg #6 – Green Hill Zone

 

The teams spent the night at Kreepy Kastle, the personal residence of K.Rool high atop Kremling Island.  The next morning, they were brought back to Krem Co. for the start of the sixth leg.  Fox & Krystal, winners of the past two legs, are the first to depart at 8am. 

 

Fox: **Tears open the clue.  Make your way to Funky’s Flights where you will fly to Green Hill Zone.

Krystal:  Ah, hedgehog country…very scenic.

 

“Teams must head back down to DK Isles to Funky’s Flights, where they will board a gyrocopter, which will take them across the ocean to their next destination, Green Hill Zone.  Once they arrive there, they will receive their next clue.”

 

One by one, the teams scamper down the metal slopes of Kremling Island.  They are then forced to swim across the saltwater inlet to the north shore of DK Isles.  With a nice head start, Fox & Krystal get there first, but Donkey & Diddy are right on their heels. 

 

Fox:  Interesting, there are four gyrocopters here.

Krystal: It looks like we’ll be traveling in groups of four.  **Fox looks over toward DK who shakes the salty sea water off, getting Fox all wet.  His decoder shorts out.

Fox: Great, now my decoder is all wet…how am I supposed to know what you freaks are saying?

 

While the first two groups head out on the gyrocopters, the next teams follow.  Dedede is able to float across the water, allowing him and Metaknight to make up lots of time on the water passage.  Meanwhile, Zelda and Link cast Farore’s Wind, allowing them to warp across the water.  These teams make it to the flight pad 3rd and 4th, and take off on the 2nd gyrocopter.

 

Mario:  Momma-mia Luigi!  So-a much for our swimming abilities being an advantage.

 

They reach the flight pad, only to find that the 3rd gyrocopter won’t take off until the 6th team has arrived.  And all the other teams are struggling.

 

Luigi: Oh my ducky look out-a.  We need another team to board the plane.

 

Mario looks out over the water.  He sees Ike, Olimar, and Jody Summer flailing in their efforts to reach the shore.  A sudden burst of wind comes along the beach and blows away his hat. 

 

Luigi: Aren’t-a you going to go get that?

Mario:  No rush-a Luigi.  It’s-a going to be a long day.

 

The first gyrocopter touches down in Green Hill Zone.  Diddy and Krystal get to the clue box at the same time. 

 

Krystal: Run through the level, the quicker the better.

 

“This is Green Hill Zone, the first level in the original Sonic the Hedgehog.  Sonic began his journey to rescue the animals of this world from the evil Dr. Robotnik here, zooming through the unique terrain, which includes looping paths, springs that send you skyward, and bumpers that can increase or stop your momentum in three tenths of a second.  Today, the teams must race on foot through Green Hill Zone, a trip of roughly three miles.  When the teams get to the other end of the course, they’ll be handed their next clue.”

 

Fox: Great, a running challenge!  Nobody’s going to keep up with us!

Krystal: Victory number three here we come.

 

Diddy shoots Krystal an aggravated look.  He turns to DK, who shrugs his shoulders.  As Fox and Krystal take off on the course, Diddy takes out his peanut popgun and shoots a load of peanuts into a diagonal bumper near the start of the course.  They fly very high into the air. 

 

DK: Un-grut?

 

Diddy smiles.  He points toward the course and motions for DK to follow him. 

 

About five minutes after the first two teams start, the second gyrocopter touches down.  Zelda and Metaknight run for the clue box. 

 

Zelda: Run through the level, the quicker the better!

Metaknight: Ha ha.  Looks like I win this round, you’ll never keep up with me, especially wearing that superficial, haughty gown of yours.

 

Metaknight takes off along with Dedede. 

 

Zelda:  Superficial?  Haughty?!  **Zelda shoots out a golden energy burst toward Metaknight and stops him in his tracks.  He is frozen and unable to move. 

Metaknight:  Hey, what is this?  Why can’t I move? 

Zelda: I hold you in place with my wisdom.  Let this be a lesson to you that insulting women and their wardrobe will get you nowhere in life.  Let’s go Link. 

 

Zelda continues to focus the energy on Metaknight while she walks backwards about a quarter mile onto the course, then she breaks the force field.  Her and Link scamper away toward the first loopty-loop.  Metaknight is still gripped by temporary paralysis and must wait for his muscles to loosen. 

 

Dedede: Look whose big mouth cost us this time.

Metaknight: Uhh…uhhh!

 

Fox & Krystal continue to speed down the course, tearing through the loopty-loops and the bumpers.  They are about to reach the last checkpoint when out of nowhere, peanuts come raining from the sky.  The foxes quickly dodge the first few, but one bounces off the flipper straight ahead and hits Krystal right in the face.  She gets knocked out cold. 

 

Fox: Uh, Krystal…Krystal wake up.  **Bam!  Fox is hit in the back of the head with another falling peanut, knocking him out as well.  About two minutes later Donkey and Diddy come winding past, trampling right over their fallen competitors. They reach the end of the course and reach the clue box.  DK opens the clue, which is a detour.

 

DK: Chiiip!  Chiiiip! 

 

“The hedgehog world is divided into various regions, called Zones.  In the original Sonic franchise, the various zones would make up the collective path that Sonic and his kitsune partner Tails would follow in order to save the animals from the evil Dr. Robotnik, now referred to as Dr. Eggman.  Once the teams complete the course in Green Hill Zone, they will come to a detour that will lead them to one of two other zones.  They will either chip it, or ship it. 

 

In Chip It, the teams will head to Casino Night Zone.  There, within the Shadow’s Knuckle Casino, they will head to the blackjack table, where they will have to take a bet of ten ring chips and double their winnings, betting between one and five rings per hand.  Once the team reaches 20 ring chips on their side of the felt, they will receive their next clue.  In Ship It, the teams will head to Oil Ocean Zone.  There, aboard the Eggman tanker ship, the teams will turn on a giant oil pipeline to fill up thirty barrels of oil.  They will then transport them across the deck to the ship’s bridge for unloading.  Once the teams have loaded up the required amount of barrels, they will receive their next clue.”

 

Back on the beach, the gyrocopters carrying the last four teams depart at the same, resulting in a mash up on the course behind the middle teams.

 

Luigi collides with Louie in the first loopty-loop, causing both of them to fall downward onto the grass below.  They land in a heap right in front of Jody Summer, who trips and falls over them.  It’s a major pileup and then the three try to get detached from one another and cannot build up the speed necessary to clear the obstacle. 

 

Luigi: Get-a outta my way!

Louie: You’re the one grabbing my spacesuit!  Let go!

Luigi: Yeah well that-a crazy woman driver’s holding my suspenders!

Summer: That’s because you fell on me, I’d be through by now if not for you two dweebs!

Louie: Who are you calling a dweeb, miss frazzle!

Summer: You’re like, three feet tall and you wear a spacesuit!  Dweeb!

 

Louie immediately pushes against Summer, knocking her down.  Luigi tries to sneak away, but Olimar comes in from the right and tackles him.  Summer regains her footing and tries to get away, but Mario arrives and uses FLUDD to spray her with a torrent of water, knocking her to the ground once again.  Watching the melee unfold, Captain Falcon gets angry.  He rushes forward with a furious falcon kick, blowing through all five adversaries and knocking them like rag dolls around the loopty-loop.  Fittingly, they all end up in a heap, like a giant pretzel just waiting to be un-knotted.   

 

Behind DK and Diddy, Zelda and Link near the end of the course when they come across Fox and Krystal.  Link keeps on running but Zelda stops. 

 

Link: Zelda what is it?  The clue box is up ahead. 

Zelda:  It’s them, Fox and Krystal.  They look like they’re hurt!

 

Link immediately comes over checks Krystal’s pulse.  Zelda does the same for Fox. 

 

Link: It looks like they took a blow to the head.  Zelda do you know a revive spell?

 

Zelda raises her hands over the heads of the two foxes and pink-colored energy comes from her white gloves.  The Triforce insignia glows for a few seconds, after which the energy subsides.  Fox starts to stir in her arms.  Krystal does the same just a minute later.  Dedede and Metaknight run right past the four of them, oblivious to what has happened.  

 

Fox: Uhhh…where are we?  Zelda?  Is this Hyrule??

Zelda: You’re in Green Hill Zone, we’re in the middle of the race. 

Link: You two were out on the ground here, so we helped you regain your senses.  You should take it easy, you’re bound to be headachy for a few days. 

Krystal: Well, I do feel a bit woozy, but we must try to continue.

 

The four walk arm and arm through the remainder of the course, Link and Zelda making sure they can walk and move well enough without stumbling or losing consciousness again.  By the time they reach the clue box, Lyn and Ike, the only team not involved in the pileup on the obstacle course, have caught up with them. 

 

Lyn: Detour, caution u-turn ahead.  Chip it or ship it.

Ike: It’s a gambling challenge versus moving a bunch of barrels of oil. 

Link: I don’t like the sound of gambling, sounds rigged and convoluted.  Let’s do the barrels.

Ike: Agreed, the barrels for us too. 

Fox: Let’s do chip it.  We’re in no condition for heavy lifting right now.

 

Meanwhile up ahead at Casino Night Zone, DK and Diddy get off to a terrible start.  They lose on their first three bets.  Diddy raises the bet for the fourth hand to two rings.  Diddy is dealt a 7, followed by a 6.  The dealer flips a jack.  Diddy is forced to take a hit, where he is dealt a 10, busting his head. 

 

Diddy: Eeee-ooowww! 

 

DK knocks Diddy aside, literally knocking him out of the chair.  He puts his remaining five rings, the table maximum, onto the felt.  The dealer gives DK a 5, followed by a 9.  The dealer flips over a 7.  DK thinks for a moment, then takes a hit.  He is given a 4, for an 18.  The dealer flips over a 5 for twelve, then a 2 for fourteen, before turning over a 6 for twenty.  The hand is lost, and the primates are out of chips. 

 

DK: Taauughh!  Taauugghh!  *flips over the table in frustration.  Several pit bosses rush in immediately along with security to restrain DK.  He is booted from the building by security personnel, which actually helps the primates focus on the fact that they failed the first end of the detour and must now perform the oil barrel challenge in order to advance. 

 

While DK and Diddy are leaving, Metaknight and Dedede arrive.  They hit the felt with fury, winning the first four hands. 

 

Metaknight: Let’s go double or nothing on this.

Dedede: We’re doing fine right now, why mess with it? 

Metaknight: If we bet big, we can ride this hot streak right through.  Put 5 in the middle. 

 

Dedede reluctantly slides five rings into the betting circle.  The penguin draws a 3, followed by an 8 for eleven.  The dealer draws a 9. 

 

Metaknight: Dedede, you have to double down on this!  You have to!  

Dedede: I know, but it’s ten.  I we lose we’re screwed.

Metaknight: Let’s go times a wasting!  If we lose we’ll go load barrels.  Now put the chips in the middle before I cut your face up.

 

Dedede turns to punch Metaknight, but thinks better of it.  He slides the chips into the middle.  The dealer turns over a queen for a 21.  Dedede claps his hands.  The dealer draws an 8 for a 17, winning the hand and ten ring chips. 

 

Metaknight: Keep pressing!  We’re almost there. 

 

Meanwhile over at the oil tanker, Ike and Lady Lyndis are moving quickly. 

 

Lyn: Your strength is simply unmatched.  How do you carry these barrels so easily? 

Ike: It comes with raising fallen timbers with my bare hands.  Just keep filling them up and I’ll keep bringing them to the bridge. 

 

Ike is able to carry the barrels two at a time, which at roughly one hundred pounds each, is no small feat.  Seeing this, Link tries to do the same, and he succeeds initially.

 

Zelda: Just like wrestling goats back in Ordona, right Link? 

Link:  Actually it’s more like wrestling a Goron.  Two of them at the same time.  

 

Back at the casino, Fox and Krystal have joined the same table as Metaknight and Dedede.  Across the way are Olimar and Louie, who perhaps due to their size didn’t like their chances with the oil tanker challenge. 

 

Olimar: Alright, we have to be cautious here.  The two other teams are still here, and we got off the course before two others.  As long as they’re here we’re not in much danger.  We just can’t lose all our chips. 

 

Louie puts two chips into the circle.  He draws a 5, followed by a 4, for 9.  The dealer shows a 7.  Louie asks for a hit and he pulls an ace for twenty.  He claps his hands in apparent glee.  However, the dealer’s hole card turns out to be a 4, giving him eleven.  He then turns over a jack for twenty-one.  Louie’s face drops. 

 

Louie: Shoot.  This challenge is going to be harder than I thought.

 

Across the room, they see Metaknight and Dedede jump up from the table hollering.  They watch as the pit boss gives them their next clue. 

 

Olimar: Well this stinks.  It’s all about survival now…

 

Meanwhile, at about the same time, five other teams are furiously filling up barrels of oil.  Link’s arms and face show the fatigue of carrying the barrels.  Zelda has now gone away from filling the barrels to help deliver them.  Mario and Luigi have employed a different strategy, filling two at a time and then delivering them both before going back to refill the next two.  Captain Falcon and Jody Summer go one better on the scheme and try to do three at once, with Falcon carrying two at once.  Ever the display of strength, Ike and Lyn deliver their last barrel of oil far ahead of the others.  They are presented with their next clue.

 

Ike: Travel by boat to Aquatic Ruin Zone, where you’ll receive your next clue.

 

Link and Zelda finish a few minutes behind Ike and Lyn, and due to their Farore’s Wind power, are able to catch up to the team from Gallia by the time the boat leaves.  The boat travels across Oil Ocean Zone into Aquatic Ruin Zone, where at the dock they come to the U-turn terminal.

 

Ike: I don’t think we should u-turn anybody.

Zelda: I agree.  We’re in the lead, and it’s not very nice.

 

The four all agree not to u-turn any of the other teams.  Ike and Link pick up the clues, which are tied to the terminal.

 

Ike: Roadblock.  Who saves the day?

 

“This roadblock features one of Zoneland’s most common animals, the jackrabbit.  Teams must head inland from the dock to the ruins.  Here in this ancient circle of stones, they will come face to face with Zoneland’s most famous villain, Dr. Eggman.  Hundreds of rabbits will be placed within the circle, and using just their bare hands, participants must save five of them from the maniacal scientist, who will use his advanced weaponry to injure and kill the animals, as well as the participants themselves.  Once five animals have been safely placed in the safe pen at the end of the circle of stones, teams will be handed their next clue.”

 

Ike: I’ll do it.  I always save the day.

Link: As do I.

Ike: It’s on fairy boy.

 

Back at the casino, Olimar and Louie have turned things around from their earlier struggle.  At the same table, Fox and Krystal are close to punching through.  With fifteen ring chips each, they take a look at each other, then Louie and Fox push five ring chips each into the circle.  The hand is dealt.  Fox gets an 8, Louie a 5.  Fox’s second card is a 4, giving him fourteen.  Louie also gets a 4, for nine.  The dealer’s up card is a 2. 

 

Fox: Ooh, a 12 against a 2, man that’s tough.  What do we do?

Krystal: I don’t know.  I’d hit though.  The odds of a dealer bust with a 2 aren’t great.

Fox: But if I draw a ten, then we lose. 

Krystal: Yeah well, if we lose then we lose.  But wouldn’t you rather say you went for it instead of sitting back and playing it safe? 

Fox: This is weird, you’re usually the cautious one.  Alright let’s hit. 

 

Fox is dealt a king, busting his hand

 

Fox: Son of a monkey! 

 

Meanwhile Louie decides to hit his hand.  He is dealt a nine, for 18.  The dealer turns over a ten, for twelve, then pulls a five for seventeen.  Louie and Olimar immediately high-five one another and turn their chips in for the next clue.

 

Olimar: Hey Fox, thanks for hitting that 12!   

Krystal: See, we would’ve lost anyway; the dealer would’ve had 21.  We had nothing to lose.

Fox: Yeah, but now we’re way behind.  This stinks. 

 

Krystal moves to the front of the betting circle and puts five ring chips back in.  The dealer turns over an eight for her.  Her second card is a three, giving her eleven.  The dealer’s up card is a five.  Without thinking about it, Krystal puts the remaining five chips in her pile into the circle to double down the hand. 

 

Krystal: Look, if this doesn’t work, we’ll head to Lake Orangatanga with the money we’ve won and have ourselves a ball. 

 

Fox is visibly nervous as the dealer turns over the double down card.  It is a 4, giving them just 15.  Fox winces at the sight.  The dealer turns over his down card, a 3.  He then turns over a 7 for fifteen, then an ace for sixteen.  His last card is a queen, busting his hand. 

 

Fox and Krystal: YES!!  They high-five and fist bump one another.  Quickly they run back to the cashier’s area to cash out and receive their next clue.

 

Donkey and Diddy labor to catch up from their earlier misfortune at the casino.  They quickly load the barrels and then take them over to the loading area.  Because of DK’s great strength, they are able to carry three at a time, a huge advantage.  Mario and Luigi were about twenty barrels ahead when they started but by the end, the primates are just a few barrels in back of the quickly tiring plumbers.  Mario and Luigi know the pressure is on as they take off for Aquatic Ruin Zone. 

 

Ahead at the circle of stones, Captain Falcon and Jody Summer have arrived in back of Link and Ike.  Like the other teams before them, they refuse to u-turn anybody.  Link quickly backs two rabbits into a corner and catches them with a righteous scoop.  Dr. Eggman’s mechanical crane knocks him over from behind though and one escapes.  Link retains his composure and deposits the one remaining into his pen.

 

Zelda: Way to go Link!  Keep it up!  Don’t let Eggman bother you!

 

Right behind Captain Falcon and Jody Summer is Metaknight and Dedede.  Ike continues to struggle to catch the rabbits.  His large size is intimidating to the small animals, and his slow foot speed doesn’t help his efforts.  Worse yet, his strong frame makes him an immediate target for Eggman’s tank.  Going for a rabbit near the middle, Eggman rams him right in the side, knocking him to the ground.

 

Ike: Watch where you’re bloody driving!  I oughta slice you right down the middle!

Lyn: Ike!  Get a hold of yourself.  You have to concentrate on the challenge!

 

Compared with the others, Jody Summer has a completely different strategy.  Instead of running after the quick-reflexed animals, she approaches them very slowly and as silently as possible.  Her gentle tactics don’t pay off initially, but it eventually convinces two of the rabbits to move right into her arms.  She deposits them into the box.  Meanwhile, the duo from Hocotate arrives, and Olimar enters the fray.  They are quickly joined by the foxes from Corneria. 

 

Olimar is left to ponder how best to catch the jackrabbits.  He initially tries using his whistle to call them, but it is unsuccessful.  But when tries to grab one, he makes a shocking discovery.  The jackrabbits are sticking to his spacesuit.

 

Olimar: Whoa…this is odd.

Louie: They’re attracted to you by static electricity!  The fur of the jackrabbits is positively charged, and you’re spacesuit has a negative charge.  Get in close and bring ‘em over!

 

Olimar simply runs through the circle and picks up about fifteen rabbits stuck to his spacesuit.  He quickly peels off three and deposits them before the others realize what is happening and all except for Jody Summer run over and tackle him.  Eggman joins the hogpile as well, eventually breaking up the group, but when all is done, Link has 3, Fox 2, and Ike and Metaknight 1 thanks to Olimar’s help. 

 

The astronaut from Hocotate gets up gingerly, and walks back toward the middle.  Before the others can jump on him again, he sticks several more rabbits onto his spacesuit and deposits them.  Louie jumps up and down at their good fortune, and he grabs the clue.

 

Louie: Go to the next pit stop, Aquatic Ruin Reef!

 

“Teams must now head to Aquatic Ruin Reef, an underwater ruin within Aquatic Ruin Zone.  This reef is the pit stop for this leg of the race.  The last team to check in here…may be eliminated.”

 

Link sees Olimar leave, and he resorts to his animalistic tendencies.  Like a wolf, he circles and stalks his prey.  A few quick grabs later, he has the two remaining animals he needs and is heading toward the pen.  Zelda quickly grabs the clue.  Within seconds they are off running toward Olimar and Louie, who are barely out of sight. 

 

DK and Donkey arrive on the scene, and now all teams are battling it out for the remaining animals.  Eggman continues to wreak havoc on the jackrabbits as well as the teams with his tank.  Jody Summer is run over as she attempts to corral her fourth jackrabbit.  After knocking her down, Eggman pivots around and whacks Dedede right in the belly.  The penguin ends up barfing right onto Eggman’s windshield, causing him to careen ruthlessly out of control and slam into the barrier wall at the edge of the rocky corral.

 

It is a footrace between the teams from Hyrule and Hocotate to the finish.  At the entrance to Aquatic Ruin Reef, Sonic, Tails, Amy Rose, Shadow, and Knuckles all stand in a semicircle around Phil, the map of the Nintendo Universe right before him.  Before long, the first team comes into view.

 

Sonic: Welcome to Aquatic Ruin Zone dudes!

 

“Olimar and Louie…you are team #1!”

 

Olimar and Louie: Waaahhhhooooooo!!  The two bump one another, but then fall due to the weight of their spacesuits.

 

“As the winners of this leg of the race, you have each won a pair of limited edition power rings crafted in Emerald Hill Zone, plus your very own sonic airships!” 

 

Olimar: Wow…that’ll sure help our transport business.

Louie: HFP will be very pleased when he hears this.

 

“And look, here comes another team.”

 

Zelda and Link come trudging through the sands of the beach and into the reef. 

 

“Zelda and Link, you are team #2.” 

 

Link: Ah, that’s good.  He hugs Zelda, who is bent over out of breath.  They congratulate Louie and Olimar on their stage win. 

 

Back at the jackrabbit corral, Luigi uses Eggman’s misfortune to his benefit.  He uses wall kicks to get on top of the battered and ruined tank, and then jumps down on top of the unsuspecting rabbits, corralling them and returning them to the pen with ease.  While this is happening, Jody Summer’s grace and Fox’s speed net them the necessary rabbits needed to advance.  This leaves DK, Dedede, and Ike as they only racers left. 

 

DK continues to be frustrated as he has been throughout the leg.  Now he cannot seem to catch the jackrabbits despite his huge hands.  His large and fearsome presence is just that to the jackrabbits, large and fearsome.  They do everything they can to run away from DK.  Ike ends up benefitting from this, as his slow speed is neutralized by the fact that the jackrabbits literally flock to him.  Within several minutes, he has the required number of rabbits in his pen. 

 

Lyn: Great job Ike, I knew you could do it!

Ike: Don’t thank me, thank the gorilla. 

Metaknight: Dedede!  You have to get the rabbits…we’re going to be out of the race if you fail!

Dedede: I can’t pick them up, my hands aren’t shaped properly and they are too small!

Metaknight: Then suck them up!

Dedede: But my stomach is killing me, I just threw up for cripes sake! 

Metaknight: Either you suck them up, or I’m ransacking Mount Dedede with the Halberd and destroying your precious castle!

 

Dedede turns red in the face, and looks like he’s going to punch Metaknight straight into the ocean.  He thinks better of it though, and turns around, opening his mouth wide.  In an instant, a great suction force is created, and though they try to avoid it, multiple rabbits are sucked in.  Dedede turns around and spits them right into the pen.  They grab the clue.  Upon seeing the duo from Popstar leave, DK turns around and begins punching Eggman’s tank.  He eventually breaks the windshield and drags the villain out, before Diddy joins him in landing blow after blow on him.  They leave the corral with Eggman and the tank in a heap, not even bothering to make it to the end of the leg. 

 

Results for Leg #6:

1st – Olimar & Louie

2nd – Link & Zelda

3rd – Falcon & Summer

4th – Mario & Luigi

5th – Fox & Krystal

6th – Ike & Lyn

7th – Dedede & Metaknight

8th – Donkey & Diddy (eliminated)

   

 



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