Legend of Zelda: Flick's Revenge

By Jason Boaz

Chapter 4: The Zelda Mud Follies

Meanwhile, back at the North Castle, Link, along with Zelda, Balayna,
Flick, Nayru, Ralph, Sprite and Miff were contemplating what to do with
Veran, when Leigh came in.  Link, who looked at her face, (which was
covered with a mud mask) mistook her for Zola. 

Link: So how are we going to stop Veran? 

Flick: In any way possible.  Even if it means ta kill Ambi II, just ta
free her from Veran.

Zelda: Not that simple, Flick.  If you cut Veran, its Ambi II who dies. 

Nayru: Zelda's right.  We'll need Mystery Seeds, a Seed Shooter or a
slingshot, and maybe a Switch Hook.

Ralph: I brought the Switch Hook.  Hopefully, Link still has the other
stuff needed to free our great great great great great granddaughter
from Veran's hold over her.

Link: No worries, Ralph.  I still have the Mystery Seeds and Slingshot
Kylara slipped into my bag.

Flick: That takes the challenge outta it.  I'm gonna force Veran outta
Queen Ambi II in any way possible.

Sprite: You should listen to Link, Flick.  Ambi II is a mother of two
children...a prince and a princess.  If she dies, those kids of hers
will never see her again!

Flick: Yes, they will.  I'll personally send the body ta them, if Ambi
is slain in the process of beatin Veran.

Miff: You...are heartless.

Flick: Heartlessness is in the eye of the beholder.  Those who seem that
way, might have a bigger heart than you realize.  Perhaps..under that
exterior, is the heart of one who's seen too much pain in their
lives...and doesn't want ta open up, fer fear of showin a sign of
weakness, like crying.

Balayna: You are very wise, Flick.  Even the toughest of us have
skeletons in our closets which we don't want people to know about.
(She's about as old as Avanna could be now.  And her eyes...they remind
me of her so much.  But they look so different...so filled with rage,
hate and shame.  Flick...if you truly are Avanna, tell me...what
happened to you?  Where were you these past five years?)  

Flick: Thank you, Nabooru.  (Those eyes...when I look into them...I
think of my mother...but why?  Why does she remind me of my mother?
Regardless, I won't unmask unless it's a final request.  Still...she
DOES look a little bit like her.  Why?)

Leigh: (comes in) Hey, guys.  What's with the heated debate?

Link: (looks at Leigh's face) OH NO!!  It's Zola!  RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!

Leigh, who totally expected something like this, playfully slapped
Link's face.

Leigh: (playfully slaps Link's face) Oh, Link.  You're so silly.
(giggles) It's just me...little old Leigh.

Link: Ouch...Leigh?  That's you?  I could've sworn you were...

Leigh: I know, Link.  You probably mistook me for Zola, on account of
this mud mask.

Link: I guess so. Sorry.  Anyway, where were you?

Leigh: I was freshening up. when I heard the commotion down here.
What's going on?

Link: First off, Veran has possessed Queen Ambi II.

Leigh: Aw, great!  Ganon's trying to sabotage this peace conference,
isn't he?

Zelda: Yeah.  By the way...this is Flick, the Assassin. 

Flick: Pleased ta meet ya...I guess.  (looks away)

Leigh: Likewise...I think.  Anyway, (sees dead boy of Simon) What happo
ened to this guy?

Link: Be lucky you weren't here beforehand.  Flick fought with Simon,
the bravest of Ambi's knights.  Simon lost, and that cost him his life. 

Flick: Look, Link...because he was so brave in facin me, I won't chop
off his head.  That's fer intended targets.  This guy gave his life fer
queen, country and family.  Never let it be said that Flick isn't fair.

Link: Alright....ok.

Leigh: Thanks for letting me know, Link.  Anything else?

Before Link can talk with Leigh about what they should do next, Dark
Leigh spotted her.

Dark Leigh: AHA!  So...there you are!  I thought you'd come, sooner or

Leigh: Dark Leigh!  I had a feeling you were here!!

Dark Leigh then took a look at her alternate self, and laughed.

Dark Leigh: (laughs out loud at Leigh) Oh MY GOSH!  You look like Koume
and Kotake with that mud mask on! 

That comment enraged Leigh, who was given a cloth to wipe the mud mask
off, from Zelda.  She was ready to make Dark Leigh pay.

Leigh: Why you...THAT'S IT!!  You're going down!!

Zelda: You weren't made at Link, when he mistook you for Zola.  Why are
you mad now?

Leigh: You know why.  If Evil Zelda came and saw YOU with a mud mask on
your face and insulted you, wouldn't you react the same way?

Zelda:  (glares at Dark Leigh, and turns to Leigh) You're right!  Here's
a cloth to wipe the mud mask off.  (hands cloth to her)

Leigh: Thanks, Zelda.  (wipes the mud mask off) Let's go teach her a

As soon as Leigh wiped the mud mask off her face, Evil Zelda had entered
the room, ready to settle the score. 

Evil Zelda: Don't forget about me!!

Zelda: (sees Evil Zelda) EVIL ZELDA!  I see its twins' night, once again
for me and Leigh.  I'm glad you're dressed for the occasion. 

Evil Zelda: Why thank you, Zelda.

Zelda: You're welcome...even though you DO wear a black-colored of copy
what I WEAR whenever we meet, I'll admit that you have good fashion

Evil Zelda: Do you really mean it?  I have good fashion sense?

Zelda: You sure do. 

Evil Zelda: Thank you.

As this little round of girl talk was coming to a climax, Flick
interrupted the whole thing.  She felt girl talk was for sissys, and
reminded them they were supposed to fight.

Flick: Will ya stop talkin about yer clothes, and start fightin?!  I'm
about ta fall asleep here!  (This girl talk is for sissys!
Zelda...you're starting to disappoint me.)

Zelda: She's right, you know.  Are you ready to fight, Evil Zelda?!

Evil Zelda: I sure am, Zelda.  and this time..I WON'T LOSE!!

Dark Leigh: When I'm through with you, Leigh, you'll be black and blue!!

Leigh: Oh, yeah?!  I'm gonna take you down!!

And so, the fight began.  Back at Death Mountain, Ganon saw the whole
thing with his crystal ball.  He started to laugh and laugh and laugh
some more.

Ganon:  Heh heh heh....Oh, brother!!  Leigh sure did resemble Zola with
that mud mask on!  AH HA HA HA HA!!  Better watch out, Link..you KNOW
what happens next!!

Sure enough, as Leigh and Zelda rumbled with their evil twins, Link
stated his worries to the LAST PERSON who'd care about such

Link: Oh no...I hope they don't end up where I think they'll end up.

Flick: What are ya talkin about?

Link: If these four fall into a mudhole, somewhere...their clothes will
be covered in mud, andI won't be able to tell which person is which.  In
other words, I won't know who to zap.  If that happens, they'll confuse
me, and I HAVE to give them a kissing contest. 

Flick: And?  What does this have ta do with me?

Link: Nothing, of course...but...I have to tell you right
now...(whispers) Evil Zelda and Dark Leigh ALWAYS want to kiss
me...it'll be the real Zelda and Leigh who might slap me, or something.

Flick, who felt that the story Link just told her was ridiculous, shook
her head, and slashed him...for a third, forth and fifth time.  This
time, she got a comment from a squeamish Prince Facade...who's starting
to get on her nerves.

Flick: (shakes her head) Tell it ta someone who cares, Link!  (slashes
Link on the other arm, and both his legs)

Link: OWTCH!!  I hate it when you do that!!

Prince Facade: Oh, no!  Please don't get any blood on my nice white

Flick: Shut up, ya spoiled brat!  (This guy's a REAL PAIN!!  So help
me...if he makes ONE MORE COMMENT about his clothes, or his being
squeamish at the sight of blood...I'm going to give him what for.)

Zelda and Leigh continued their rumble with Evil Zelda and Dark Leigh.
Nayru was worried, since they were heading for the balcony's
edge...however...Ralph wasn't so worried since he noticed something that
might save them from death...not to mention...get their clothes dirty.

Nayru: (notices Zelda, Evil Zelda, Leigh and Dark Leigh are careening
towards the balcony's edge) Look at those four, Ralph.  They're about to
go off the balcony's edge!  Somebody stop them!!

Ralph: Relax, Nayru.  They'll be okay.  Take a look over there.  (points
to a mud hole, conviently below the balcony) 

Nayru: You're right.  We don't have to worry...but Link does.

Link: I do?  Why do I have to worry?

Nayru: Take a good look at what's below the balcony.

Link: (sees the mudhole) Oh, NO!!  I know where THIS is going!!  (looks
at Prince Facade) Prince Facade, if you want to be a hero, then follow
me!!  (goes down the stairs, and goes through the main castle gates)

Prince Facade: Alright.  I'll finally prove to Zelda I'm worthy of her.
(follows Link)

Link: (looks at Prince Facade, and thinks to himself) That's right,
Prince Spoilsport!  follow me to where Zelda, Leigh and their evil twins
are BOUND to LAND.  You'll change your tune once their clothes are
covered with mud!

Nayru, Balayna, Ralph and Flick, not wanting to miss out, followed Link
and Prince Facade. 

Nayru: Well, shall we join them?

Flick: Sure...why not?  Might as well go with ya.  Veran's otherwise
occupied watching the rumble, at the moment.  I'll get ta attend with
her, in a minute.

Ralph: Ok...then it's settled!  Let's GO!!

Balayna: No way I'm missing out!  Come on!!

As Flick, Nayru and Ralph followed Link and Prince Facade, Veran, who
was in Ambi II's body, was watching the brawl, sure enough.  She too,
saw the mudhole.  She knew what would happen as well.  Of course, since
Miff and Sprite were virtually alone, they decided to wait for Dark
Leigh's barrier over the delegates to dissipate...so they could talk
with Oberon, king of the Fairies....and Sprite's father.

Possessed Ambi II: Oh, my...they're all going to fall into that mudhole.
Why did Ganon send Evil Zelda, anyway?  Unless...(Of course!  He must be
bored, and wants to have a good laugh.  This should be fun to watch.
Heh heh heh heh...ha ha ha ha.)

Miff: (looks around) Looks like everyone went to see Zelda, Leigh and
their bogus selves fall into the mud, huh Sprite?  (Why does the
princess want to do that?  I think Link's being a bad influence...either
that, or she ENJOYS slapping that buffoon during the kissing contests.
YEAH!  That has to be it.)

Sprite: Yeah.  Want to go talk with my dad, after Dark Leigh's sent into
the Evil Jar?

Miff: Sure.  Let's wait outside the barrier until it's gone.

Just then, outside the Castle, Link, along with the others, finally made
it to the mudhole  Prince Facade wanted to know why they were standing
near a mud hole.

Prince Facade: Oh my...WHY are we standing here, near this FILTHY pit of

Link: You'll find out, in 5...4...3...2...1...NOW!!

As Link counted down, Leigh and Zelda noticed the mud hole, and decided
to tackle Dark Leigh and Evil Zelda over the balcony's edge.  They all
fell right into  the path of the mudhole.

Leigh: (notices the mudhole) See what I see, Zelda?

Zelda: Sure do, Leigh.  Are you thinking, what I think we're both

Leigh: Yep.  Time for us and our twins to get down and dirty!!  NOW!
(tackles Dark Leigh)

Zelda: Right!  (tackles Evil Zelda)

Evil Zelda and Dark Leigh: Uh oh...(are tackled, and go over the edge)
NNNOOO!!  (notices where they're about to end up) NOT AGAAIIINNN!!

Zelda and Leigh: Oh, YES!  We're all going down...into the mud!!

Sure enough, their landing was softened by their falling into the mud.
Of course, this really disturbed Prince Facade, who got a

Prince Facade: Oh, NO!  They all fell into the mud! 

Link: Yeah.  It's a real shame, isn't it?

Zelda and Leigh, who's clothes were completely covered in mud, along
with those of Dark Leigh's and Evil Zelda's, both smirked and asked
Prince Facade if he wanted to come in and get them out.  He refused, of
course...as they thought he would.

Zelda: (smirks) Well?  Aren't you going to get us out?

Leigh: (smirks) Yeah.  Come on into the mud and fish us out...if you're
a real man, that is.

Prince Facade: FORGET IT!  There is NO WAY I am going IN THERE to get
you ladies out.  I'm dreadfully sorry.

Zelda and Leigh: We thought not. 

This got Flick really ticked off.  She then made a mudball and threw it
on the Prince's shirt.  That caused the vain prince to faint.

Flick: That does it!!  (makes a mudball) Here's mud on yer shirt!!
(throws the mudball on Prince Facade's shirt)  Fer a Prince...you're not

Prince Facade: (sees his shirt covered in mud) NNOOO!  This simply
cannot do!  I think I'm going to faint.  (faints)

Prince Facade's fainting spell got a laugh out of everyone...except for
Flick.  Even Mara Hespera, who was watching, was laughing.

Nayru: Awww...How the mighty have fallen!  HA HA HA HA!!

Ralph: Heh heh.  You're right about that, honey.

Balayna: Down goes the vain Prince. HA HA HA HA!!

Link: Alright, Flick!  You nailed him! (laughs)

Flick: Hmph.  He got what he deserved.

Zelda, Leigh, Evil Zelda and Dark Leigh: (all laugh) And that's the way
the vain prince crumbles!!

Mara: (still watching) AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!!  That's such a riot!  I'll
bet the best is yet to come!  This has been a SWELL peace conference, so

Mara's mother: Mara, behave yourself.

Mara: Whoops...sorry, mother.  (Oh boy...my mother and father are the
ONLY PEOPLE who I'm POWERLESS against.  Oh well...I hope I stay long
enough to see what the next phase of Ganon's plan is...not to mention
watching Veran awaken Ambi II's sleeping powers and manipulate time!
That alone will make this trip worthwhile.)

Back at the mudhole, Link was unable to figure out who's who...AS USUAL.
He decided to conduct the kissing contest. 

Link: Aw, man...Prince Facade might be down and out...but NOW I DON'T

Leigh: Come on, Link!  Zap her!  That's Dark Leigh!

Dark Leigh: Don't be fooled, Link.  She's the evil one!  I'm Leigh.  I
scared you with my mud mask earlier, didn't I?

Link: Yeah...but Dark Leigh saw Leigh in the mud mask, too...that
doesn't count.

Zelda: What are you waiting for, Hero?!  Attack that witch!

Evil Zelda: Don't pay attention, Link!  Zap her!!  I'm the real Zelda!

Link: Aw, man...this is SO confusing.  Only one thing to do...Kissing
Contest time.

Nayru whispered to Flick, asking if she knew who the real Zelda and
Leigh were.

Nayru: (whispers to Flick) Umm...Flick...do you happen to know which
pair are the real Zelda and Leigh?

Flick: (whispers to Nayru) They're definitely the ones on the right.

Nayru: (whispers to Flick) Should we tell Link?

Flick: (whispers to Nayru) And spoil the surprise?  I don't think so. 

Nayru: (whispers to Flick) You're right.  Let's just watch the whole
thing go down.

Link started off with Evil Zelda.  She gave him a passionate kiss.

Link: (points to Evil Zelda, who's on the left) Alright...you first.

Evil Zelda: I thought you'f NEVER ask.  (gives Link a passionate kiss)

Link: Very good.  Now, its your turn.  (looks at Zelda)

As usual, Zelda responded with a slap.

Zelda: (slaps Link) Now is NOT the time for kissing, hero!!

Link: Ouch!  That's the Zelda I know and love.

This got Evil Zelda furious, and it also got her zapped back into the
Evil Jar.

Evil Zelda: I swear...I HATE MUDHOLES!  (lunges at Zelda)

Link: Not so fast!  (zaps Evil Zelda with the Cressword.)

Evil Zelda: Aw fudge...I'LL BE BACK!!  (disappears)

As Evil Zelda vanished, it was Dark Leigh's turned.

Link: Well, It's your turn, Leigh.  (points to Dark Leigh, who's on the
left) Ready?

Dark Leigh: I sure am.  (kisses Link on the lips) Mmmm mmm

Link: WOW!  VERY HOT!!  (points to Leigh) Alrightie, it's your turn.

Leigh, who was once again in a playful mood, asked Link to pucker up,
and close his eyes.

Leigh: Pucker your lips, and close your eyes...and I'll give you a big

Link: (shrugs) Okay.  I'll do it. (does as Leigh says)

As soon as Link closed his eyes, Leigh made a mudball, and threw it onto
Link's face. 

Leigh: (makes a mudball and throws it at Link's face) You can open them,
now.  (looks at Zelda) Got a mirror?

Zelda: Yeah. (smirks and gives a mirror to Link) Take a good look, Link.

As Link looked into the mirror that Zelda lended him, he was aghast.
Leigh smirked, and said he looks good with a REAL mud mask.

Link: (looks into mirror) OH NO!!  My FACE!  It's all muddy!

Leigh: (laughs) You know, I think you look kind of silly with a REAL mud
mask.  (looks at Zelda) Isn''t that right, Zelda?

Zelda: It sure is, Leigh.

Link: Ha ha.  Very funny, Leigh.  I know you're the real one, now.  Do
you want the pleasure of zapping your evil twin? 

Leigh: Sure thing.

Dark Leigh: Uh oh...

Leigh looked at Dark Leigh, and zapped her with a magic bolt from her
staff.  That blast sent her back into the Evil Jar.

Leigh: See you later, alligator!  (Zaps Dark Leigh)

Dark Leigh: NNOOO!!!  I'll get you yet!!  (disappears)

Flick: Well, I guess that's that.  Can we get Veran now? 

Link: Sure.  We'd better go back to the conference room.

As Dark Leigh appeared in the Evil Jar, Ganon was rolling with laughter.
As soon as  he got his fair share of belly laughs, he commanded Veran to
awaken Ambi II's hidden powers.

Ganon: AH HA HA HA HA HA HEH HEH HEH HEH!!  I knew it would end this
way!!  Now THAT...IS FUNNY!  Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho.  (gets serious)
Now...it's time to initate the final phase of my plan.  (looks into the
Crystal Ball and talks with Veran)  Veran...can you hear me?

Possessed Ambi II: Yes, master.  What is your desire?

Ganon: It is time, Veran.  Awaken Ambi II's sleeping powers and bring
time to a halt.  Everyone except for Link, Zelda, Ralph, Nayru, Nabooru
and Flick will be affected.  I want you to take care of them, as soon as
the work is done!!

Possessed Ambi II: Understood, master.  It will be done.  Over and out.

As the picture of Veran, who was inside Ambi II faded, Ganon looked on
at Flick with his crystal ball, and wondered who she was, and why did
she feel so familar.

Ganon: Rrraarrrg!!  Who are you, Flick?  Why do you seem so familiar to
me?!  I don't know why I thiink I know you, but I shall wait for the
time you unmask!  Then...if you're who I think you are...you will be

Is Ganon right?  Is Flick the one who he suspects she truly is?  Will
Veran succeed in stopping time?  Can Flick and the others stop the
Sorceress of Shadows?  In fact, will Link stop Flick from killing Ambi
II in the process?  Will the long-lost Avanna be found?  And, is Flick
really Avanna, the one who Nabooru was looking for, all this time?  The
tension has become so thick, you can cut it with a knife.  The time when
Flick will unmask is drawing near. Don't miss the exciting events in the
thrill-packed 5th chapter, "Flick Unmasked!"

To Be Continued...

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