You Shouldn't Have Done That!

By David Meiklem

Here we are again, another seventy-two hours to further my quest, or drown my sorrows in the Milk Bar, I have as much time as I want really. Get's darn annoying having to collect my bombs and arrows and all that junk but at least my rupees are safe in the bank, good thing I chose the Clock Town one over Northern Rock though. Well I only have one more giant to awaken anyway but I think for this cycle I'll just chill out, wander round Clock Town, help some people, maybe kill Sakon by shooting the bag with an arrow this time (hey at least I can go back in time so he's not dead, who though you can undo murder?). I mean even the 'Hero of Time' gets to relax now and again!

But...huh? It's the first day...but everybody's disappeared! What the heck! And the moon, it's disappeared, what's up with that? For some reason I can hear the Song of Healing in my head, but it's backwards. Oh man, this is weird. Well, nobody round the clock tower, let's try East Clock Town. What! Nobody's here either! Oh man, this is really screwed up. Wait a minute, it's almost on the edge of my mind, a name....that name...Ben. Ben? What a weird name! Let me think, did I ever help someone called Ben in this or last video gah-uh I mean adventure? Nope. So why in Din's name is that name lurking in the corridors of my mind.

You know maybe this is what happens when you never speak....

Oh well, Clock Town's as vacant as a Redead's stare. Let's go outside.

It's eerily quiet out here. No birds singing, no monsters lurking about and what. Is that the mask salesman, Epona and the Skull Kid standing there? But how can Skull Kid be there if he's supposed to be on top of the Clock Tower! Agh! Maybe I've been using the Song of Time too much, if only I'd spent more time actually doing the dungeons instead helping people I've never met before (but which look remarkably similar to people I do know) I could have been back in Hyrule now. Ahh Hyrule...Saria and me...walking through the Lost Woods, jamming on our ocarinas outside the Forest Temple and Zelda? Oh yes, Zelda. Oh how I long to be back in Hyrule with you. What's this I see her father, the king?

"Mah boi, this peace is what all true warriors strive for!"

What the heck! Oh enough dreaming, what am I gonna do out here?

Maybe just a fluke, I'll try and the play the song of time again. Dum dum dum, dum dum duh-WAHHHHHHHHHH I'M ON FIRE OHMYGOD OHMYGOD DROPANDROLL RICKROLLRICKROLL UHH...

"You've met with a terrible fate haven't you"?

Well, there's the understatement of the century!

Well I’m back to the Dawn of the First Day.  I hope that was a fluke.  I think I’ll go the swordsman’s training centre and brush up on my sword skills...what?  I’m back in Hyrule?  I appear to be in the Happy Mask Shop.  But the creepy salesman isn’t here (probably a good thing).  But that other guy who talks about the sign is here.  Maybe I’d better say something.

 “Hi there!” I say.

“You shouldn’t have done that.” He replies in a monotone voice.

“Shouldn’t have done what?” I reply, more than a little freak out.

“You shouldn’t have done that?” he repeats again, with less emotion than a Gibdo.

“Shouldn’t have done what?  Opened the Door of Time?  Pulled out the Master Sword?  Assaulted that Cuckoo?  Come on man, spit it out!”

“You shouldn’t have done that.” 

Oh you know what, just forget it, I’m out of here!  So I open the door, step outside and I outside Hyrule Castle.  Looking up I see, Kaepora Gaebora perched on that tree.  Oh no, he is gonna talk about something I already know ‘cause it’s so freaking obvious and then ask me if I understood. 

“You shouldn’t have done that.”

That is what he says instead.   Man people in Hyrule sure have a limited vocabulary!  Maybe if I go back towards the Market I’ll find people with more than five words in their mental filing cabinet.  So I go back and...what in the name of Din!  I’m in an underground grotto!  Oh man, this is weird.  That Skull Kid must be messing with me.  Oh look a treasure chest, let’s open it.  Wow.  Nothing.  I got Nothing.  How wonderful.  Well nothing else I can do here except step back into the light... and hey, I’m back in Clock Town, and the stairs to the top of the tower are down!  Skull Kid, you’ve been messing with my head, I’ve had enough!  It’s time to settle this once and for all! 

All right then Skull Kid, I’ve had enough of ending up in random places, creepy music, statues and people saying, well you know.  This is it!  I’m gonna play the Oath to Order, and bring some order into this chaos!  Doo doo doo, NOOOOOOOO NOT AGAIN I’M ON FIRE!  OH AH AH AH, PUTITOUT SOMEBODY PLEASE

“Mr Link.”

“Huh, oh...Anju!  It’s you!  I’m in the Stock Pot Inn.  It was all a bad dream!”

“You were shouting and screaming, you must have woken up the whole Inn.  But I’m glad to see you’re alright now.  Anyway, we have a new guest today.”

“Oh I see, well I’ll be going to Ikana anyway so he can have this room.  What’s his name?”



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