A Very Merry Christmas

by Mallard

Chapter 1

    It was a cold winters day on the streets of New York City, United States of America, the year, 1999. People busied themselves buying gifts for their children, as it was Christmas Eve, and many others went caroling, bought food, ate food, threw food at other people, and basically just had fun. But fun was the last thing the CEO of Scrooge Incorporated had in mind. There was work to be done, and his money was waiting for him. One of the tallest skyscrapers in New York was the base of operations, and it was only dwarfed by the Empire State Building, World Trade Center, and other various buildings.

    The Board of Directors was a highly corrupted group, favoring only Ganondorf Scrooge and they would stick with him, no matter how completely horrible the task was. Keln was the chief of operations around New York, and Soman was the chief of Foreign Affairs. Keln was Russian, and Soman, well, no one knew where he came from. But then there was the highly evil woman Gohma, and Dodongo, and Barinade, who seemed to shock anyone who came near him. Then there was Ganondorf's brother, Ganon, and of course, Volvagia, and the company's mascot, Morpha, who was an amoeba, and then there was Bongo Bongo, and the twin sisters Koume and Katake. And there was "Moneyman" himself, Ganondorf Scrooge. The only good man in the entire group was Link Crachit, an entirely honest man who worked hard for a living but was considered a nuisance by Scrooge. As of late, he had been working overtime just to get his kids some decent food. One of them, Tiny Tom, was very sick, but still kept up the good spirits, inheriting his father's qualities. At the moment, Link was down working in Scrooge's office, doing paperwork and counting up the enormous taxes that the company had to pay.

    "Bah Hamburg, taxes, taxes, taxes! It's always taxes! What you earn, the government takes away! I swear, Bill Clinton will kill me before I die!" Scrooge muttered.
"Sir, do you realize that doesn't make sense? And besides, you ARE the government!" Link chuckled.
"Don't get smart with me! I think you're worse than me, making jokes about your poor boss!" Scrooge shouted back.
"Really, I think that the mayor thinks you think that he thinks you think he thinks you think he thinks you think he thinks you think that you're the government!" Link said. Scrooge slammed his fist onto his desk.
"Can't you see? I've made history, I'm richer then Bill Gates!" he laughed. Link rolled his eyes.
"I'm actually starting to LIKE Bill Gates now!" he chuckled.
"Look, will you just get out of here? You can go home! Have Christmas off! Have the day after off! What the heck, YOU'RE FIRED!" Scrooge yelled.
"But-but sir, I don't have another place to go! I've got rent to pay, our little apartment costs almost $1,000! Plus the IRS takes my money! And that dude John Carpenter who works for the IRS got a million bucks on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire!" Link cried.
"Shut up! And that coin you have in your pocket, I'll take it!" Ganondorf sneered, reaching into Link's pocket. He took the penny out and laid it on his desk.

    Link walked out dejectedly. "Now what am I going to tell Zelda and the kids?" he moaned. He saw all sorts of people desperately trying to get toys for their kids, and he thought for a moment that he was lucky not to be caught up in all the hustle and bustle of the shopping, but then shook himself out of it. He wanted his kids to have a really good Christmas. He walked up to his apartment. He walked up the stairs, and up to the room. He opened the door with his key. His family went up to him and hugged him.
"How are you? You don't look too well." his wife Zelda said.
"I've been fired, of all things." Link replied. His family gasped.
"Why, Link, that's horrible!" his mother Loretta said. His younger sisters Rundan and Saria hugged him, as did his three little children, Liam, Winston, and Anna.
"Nakil in trouble again?" Link asked.
"Yeah, held up a bank, police caught him, now he's up for a few years in the slammer!" Saria said, almost laughing.
"Saria, he's your brother!" Loretta scolded.
"Oh, it's what he deserves!" Link said, lying down on the couch.
"Well, he wasn't always a bad egg! But then he heard about that Ganondorf Scrooge and decided to go to work for him. The next thing you know, Ganondorf has him working for him! I was afraid you'd be corrupted too, Link, but thank goodness you weren't!" Loretta sighed.
"Well, I've got ethics!" Link said.

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